21-04-2009 watch cape no. 7 in work? so best? nah, didnt finish watch it, no mood

1:51 PM 

just back from lunch, chatted with Carmen, Cole and Ron in different window, published a long blog post. Checked some blog and facebook profile. I see an update but i don't know what i mean or what it write, it is more like a story to me after some translate. Going to watch cape no. 7 movie in my phone after this. Write something later. 

2:04 PM 

i am currently watching cape no. 7 the song that Shirley put on her blog is the first song that sing in movie. It is so funny just now, can't say the story here because Raven will know the story. Okay then, continue watching it right now. 

2:09 PM

hamsap movie.. LOL girl changing clothes in bus, the driver lose concentration and almost accident, can't tell a lot. I am so lazy right now, a lots of book to arrange. Watch awhile first. Gosh, the accident knock down a guy, who is it, how it knock down? Why no one know? Watch it. 

2:17 PM 

narrator talk in japanese? Cool.. This is a taiwan movie. Just start watching it, not bad. Just now.. Can't say. This blog is for all reader, i don't want to say the story out not because of Raven. Continue watch first. 

2:22 PM 

LOL the main character so unlucky kena saman but others don't, why and why? Please watch cape no. 7 and support this movie. The police tak puas fight with the main character because of? I should not say half or say anything. It is funny. Must watch it. 

2:29 PM 

so diao xD i hope i can watch with full length and view.. Think of someone again. Maybe it already don't want friend with me, what i care. Continue my movie. 

2:38 PM 

hahaha, so funny xD do some work then continue watching it. It is so nice and funny. You are must watch and support. Okay then, write something later. 

4:05 PM 

this post will be very short if i am not wrong. Sms with Raven just now, she is going to be *ding* so pity. Hope she is fine. As long as i don't admit or say anything, there will be no reason of saying me into someone. 

4:12 PM 

i will say oh my god and knock my head on wall if S read the post i make. I don't think she will read and R don't ask her to read, i will kill you, it is nothing to be read, only will misunderstood and turn worse. Why the time pass so slow now? I am doing nothing. Arrange book now. 

4:37 PM 

why people say love is pain? Is there any reason? Of course there are reason for why. When we fall to someone we like, of course we will hope to drop on it. If we get rejected, where else we will fall or drop to? Ground right? Thats pain but the wound we get, the experience we have will make us stronger no next fall. Not logic at all.. Write something later. 

4:55 PM 

you know what nonsense is this? This must be a joke or something. Do you agree that actually loving someone can love without reason because it is feeling? Much of the people will say something when we ask, (why you love) if i can't say, does it mean i don't like? For me, the true answer and reason for why you love him or her is same (it is because i love him or her) this is just my comment and info, if don't mean anythings. 

5:11 PM 

do you all know that? Actually clown is a creature that come from a world call hell? They are horrible. I am so scare of clown and i don't like to think and say about it but there are something that i want to share so much. Clown born and created in circus at (forget which country) I am so scare and don't want to share a lots already. Lets say their bad things. Clown give happiness to children, a lots of kid like clown. By the way, do you all know, what does clown eat? What is the clown real name? Clown eat children, clown real name is stupid, no, it is devil. Actually i really don't understand why all kid like clown, actually i am thinking of BECOMING clown and entertain some kids, this will cure my phobia. I don't mind to disguise as clown if i know i can make kids happy with it. Scary. Hate clown. 

5:41 PM 

should i bath right away after get home or online first? Better bath early to thats i will publish this post late. Never mind. On my back home now. I don't know why i see so many unknown object. Bath.. On staircase to home now. Post end

21-04-2009 i make this post in very early time

6:57 AM 

good morning, i write this post in very early time because i want to post up something. R sms me just now, luckily i am not asleep or R will wake me up, i think R is angry with me but i know R is very good so she will understand me i guess. I will get up and online after writing this. Have a nice day, this is my wish to all for today. 

8:35 AM 

on my way to work now, i am late, tell you what i did and why i am late later. Tell you some other things later too. Need to make i long post to lower down some post. I will write some comment about R sms too. Just pray that i got time for it to make my long blog post. Okay then, reach already. 

8:53 AM 

i am so naughty, i need to pick and pack some mounting board now but i am writing my blog post. Suddenly pop up and think of someone. Every nick or name or things related to it, surely will think someone. Write my post later. Must do my work. 

9:17 AM 

write something awhile. Tell you why i am late. Just now i am playing a facebook pet game call SuperPoke! Pets. I am searching someone profile from the superpoke pets official website to add her as friend. It is crazy lots and hard to search, i find from a topic post. You will know the difficulty on how to search when you try. Much of it will give up searching it. I am wrapping some mounting board now, write something later. 

10:46 AM 

for now, i really don't dare to think a lots of stuff. Don't have to feel guilty, i am stupid. Actually i already let go the feeling that i am having. Fell to someone, don't think about it. There are one things that i want to write so much, it is quite weird actually, i don't know what will people think about it. Only me will understand what i write, saying myself. 

at very first, i think it is fake, but it already passed so many day, i still don't feel like forgetting for fading. No sound or any news, day passed like normal, make myself exhausted every night just like drunking myself. Whats going on into me? Why is it so strong? I really don't understand why. Another week, so lets see, will my feeling fade. It is a bit stupid to be so fake, no sound or news also can maintain. I don't believe myself, i pass the day with exhausted every night. 

there must be something wrong if someone understand the word that i write in quotes form format. I am not holding R anymore, i pushed it away, not let go. Any day, how are you today? This question only will be asked by people that didn't really contact with each other for a time. Example i don't ask Raven how are you because i keep in touch with her daily. Example i don't sms a lot with Kenny so he will be asking how are you everytime. If you found someone that didn't ask how are you, it mean they know how are you recently by checking your update of day. How are you? Are you fine? Actually this type of question that asked by someone to someone can observe something. This timeline post make me sick me thinking, i still want to write but i have to stop or i will think and feel [how are you and are you fine] anxious. 

11:42 AM 

i am just like drunking myself every night by making myself exhausted. I don't drink alcohol so i make myself exhausted. I am so stupid, it don't work at all but i am still sleeping late every night. Viewing blog its blog without any reason although i know it would change or have any update. I am so angry with myself now, i can't memorize thing well because of sleeping late, blurring. I hate myself to have this kind of feeling again, it is stupid. Snap some photo for this blog post. 

11:57 AM 

last time, i really fall to R, it is real and i really loved R before, maybe she think it is just like a type of fake feeling but i know myself well. Of course i should let go if she already been taken because i don't steal. Hate myself so much, why must i fall to someone? It is by what or how? Or actually there are no reason on loving someone? The feeling that i am having now must be temporarily or fake, i know it will fade one day. I don't dare to think or tell myself about it because it is a nonsense. I am so tired and sleepy, the mood that i am having is just like dreaming only. A question, what will i do if a clown chase me? (i will runaway, i will beat him) this answer will make me know how you think about me. I got clown phobia. Accidentally rubbed my eye too hard, i am too tired. I want to sleep, i need to sleep. Actually the problem that i am having now left one or two, other is really fine already, only one that bugging me. My lunch time is almost there, i am so stupid, lunch time then lunch time la. Going to publish this post. I make this post in very early time, why the post is so short? Don't care about it. I make so many post yesterday. Raven is my only friend that i trust the most, why can't i share or tell her my problem or thinking? I know she will keep it as secret right? Raven, if you read this post already, i will try not to hide anything from you and try to tell you the true and problem. To unlock my mouth to tell you my problem, you need a code when send me sms. The code is my birthday code, remember the three number? Tell me the code and i will understand and i will tell and share you. Sorry for hiding, i don't mean to hide my problem to a friend that i can trust. This post contain more than 6 kilo bytes of size so it will be very long. When can i have lunch, i am so hungry.. By the way, i need some suggestion about, if i don't have any work and i am not going to study, should i have some rest in house first or must get a work quick from now? I am going to end my post now because i write too much of things. I will continue my blog post after lunch. Thanks Raven a lot, she read my blog a lot. Now i remember what i want to write so much. Okay now, i don't know why i will feel sad or be abandon. I am type of human that stay more in house more than getting social. Everytime when i hear someone is having activities or going out, i will feel like get dump and feel sad, is it normal or i should not feel that? Going back home now. Publish this.